So you’re going to be a Dad… for the first time. And you have no flipping clue as to what to expect… Well that’s exactly what I was thinking. There is no “All Dad’s Need to Read this” kinda manual… You just need to wing it. Well there’s a plethora of “Parenting advice” from Google and other parenting sites… Much like this one. but they often give “The Perfect Parent” advice where it will only make you feel inferior as you will never be as good as them… I call bollocks on the majority of those sites. I was a reader, and a researcher of the “New dad” posts, but came to realise that the writers are fathers of 4+ children and provide no real input other than regurgitating the already perfect world father posts found online. This is where I will go a step further. I’m not going to sugar coat anything. I will, and always promise to be 100% truthful with you as the new Dad or new Dad to be.
So let’s get a few things straight… Any idiot can make a baby, but it takes a real man to be a father. An old, but always true saying. Next, being a father doesn’t mean you stand there bewildered as your wife/better half does EVERYTHING for the child. Because then, you become a spectator more than a father.
Possibly THE most important thing that you need to realise – The world you knew, is now GONE. Your Sleep, Gone. Personal time, gone. (At least for a undisclosed time) You now exist for one reason, to look after and care for this helpless little noise and poop-maker. Your first few weeks will be the roughest of your life. You will forget about the worries of yesterday, as you will now be focused on this living breathing extension of you.
So, if you are worried about changing a dirty diaper/nappy – You need to get over that shit FAST. Leaving your better half to deal with every soiled mess is sure to end in tears. Get your fucking hands dirty my friend.
Being a new father also has it’s joys, you get to experience exactly what it’s like when your wife has to deal with a very drunk you. A drooling, unhappy and very often dirty mess. You get to see the small fragile pale skinned “alien looking” human come in to this world and grow. Yes you will notice everyday how fast a baby grows.
This is just an intro to what I call the first few stages of fatherhood. I am yet to experience the terrible 2’s and Thank God it’s sleeping 3’s – But we will get there.
If you’re reading this because you and your happy wife are looking forward to creating a family for the first time… Think LONG and HARD about the following things:
- Are you REALLY sure you want to have a child?
- Have you owned a pet and had the thought of “Wow this is hard work!”
- Do you want to take on the biggest responsibility of your life?
Then yes… By all means, try and have a baby. It’s the best part… but remember once that baby comes, it will take ALL of you to make it work. I’ll leave it there for today.
Come back soon for another installment of Rad Dad or Bad Dad…